Meeting Dostoevsky

Every time I open that last book of his, he tells me that before I go any further, I must submit to the lens of the only beautiful type of suicide, the kind that brings life. The epigraph to The Brothers Karamazov  frames what’s to come in the words spoken and incarnated by Christ: thatContinue reading “Meeting Dostoevsky”

Spring’s Not Green Here, But…

Spring’s not green here, but for now, the melting will do. And though some might consider the in-between a muddy mess, littered, mushy, I’ll compare it to Oreo pie, confettied, since it means that green exists, just not yet. I’ve walked and walked in steps of fear joy uncertainty prayer shaking strong, and today isContinue reading “Spring’s Not Green Here, But…”

Unless a Kernel of Wheat

“Very truly I tell you, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds.” John 12:24 These are the words of Jesus that Dostoevsky chose to open The Brothers Karamazov  with, words that are now etched as the epitaphContinue reading “Unless a Kernel of Wheat”

A Psalm of Life

Earlier this morning, I was paging through an old copy of Longfellow poems my grandmother had given me. I had always treasured the old volume from 1896, embossed with silver etchings and delicate roses. I thought that I might bring it with me to share with my students in Russia; after all, Longfellow was fromContinue reading “A Psalm of Life”

‘Tis Time, My Friend, ‘Tis Time

‘Tis time, my friend, ‘tis time! For rest the heart is aching- The first line of my favorite Pushkin poem has faithfully rhythmed in my mind day after day with increasing intensity as graduation has drawn near. I have savored these words like a piece of butterscotch candy through every brain-aching, burnt-out final paper. IContinue reading “‘Tis Time, My Friend, ‘Tis Time”